Friday, November 28, 2008

Dear Cr-Abby from Happily Married in Corpus Christi


CO-WORKERS TRY TO BURST BUBBLE OF WOMAN'S HAPPY MARRIAGE
DEAR CR-ABBY: I have been married for 15 years to the sweetest man in the world. We love each other, we like each other, and I feel truly fortunate.
I was recently involved in a conversation with some co-workers who were discussing marriage, and they asked me what I would do if my husband left me. I told them I trust my husband completely, and I know he would never leave me.
I was then informed that I am living in a fairy tale! The rest of the conversation was spent trying to convince me that my husband will eventually leave me, even though none of these people has ever met him. He has never cheated on me. I tried to explain that there are still some decent men in the world, but they refused to accept it.
Cr-Abby, I prefer not to live my life looking for negative things because I believe it taints relationships. I believe that if I continue to view my marriage as blessed and wonderful, it will be. Why can't people allow others to be happy? What prevents these people from seeing good instead of bad and, more important, why can't they see that there are couples in good marriages who are committed to making them work?
-- HAPPILY MARRIED IN CORPUS CHRISTI
Dear Delightfully Deluded near Dallas,

This co-worker was clearly trying to plant some mistletoe atop the company copier with you and you should pay him no heed. That said, I think you should not allow such a conversations to go on very long without a shrap rebuke. Make it clear where you stand.
Most people don't go "looking for affairs" it is the unfortunate alignment of the temporary ebbs and flows of a marriage intersecting with a flirty conversation coinciding with a power failure at work. Add a less-than-morally grounded suitor in the mix and "poof", bliss begats betrayal. The imps and gnomes are always at work and unless you are vigilant those forces can lead a value-centric person to cross that line.
Be vigilant not to drift to close to the flame dear moth, your wings will get singed and your ability to fly happily along will be forever injured.
Cr-Abby

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